I mentioned in a previous post that I had been under a lot of stress. I finally spilled the beans on my regular blog and admitted that I am going through a divorce. Apparently I am now on the Divorce Diet. I have been told I look like I am losing weight, and I was somewhat dismayed to find out today that this is true. I was getting ready to go to swimming lessons this morning, and put on my lace-up board shorts. The last time I wore them was August 21st, 3 weeks ago. The shorts fit completely differently this time. I had to lace them much tighter. I'm not sure what my weight in numbers is, but I measured and have lost over an inch around my hips since July.
Now, of course I want to be skinny and hot. But I want it to be on MY terms, because of MY effort. This just felt like another way I'm not in control of my life. I assure you that this difference is solely because of the stress and resulting way I've been eating, not because I decided to eat better and followed through, and definitely not because I've been exercising consistently.
Friday's food is a good example of how the Divorce Diet is going for me. Before I left the house, I grabbed a piece of whole wheat toast with butter, which I usually love. It tasted like cardboard. I ate about 3 bites. I got to work and started drinking my green smoothie. It was gross, way too sweet. I made myself drink about half of it. When I walked upstairs and opened the door, I could literally smell the Cookie Friday cookies 10 feet away, which I've not experienced before. I grabbed four cookies off the plate, but saved them for later because they didn't seem appealing at all right then. I had a peach and an apple sitting around, so I cut them up. They tasted really weird. They had been sitting for a few days, but they looked fine. Either they weren't fine, or my taste buds are messed up!
Finally, it's lunch time, and I'm absolutely starving. I brought leftovers from the night before, when I made whole wheat pasta with Onion-Blue Cheese sauce from this recipe. The sauce is supposed to go with steak, but I haven't purchased beef in quite a while and didn't feel like doing so now. The sauce was pretty gross. Blue cheese used to be my FAVORITE, but now it made the sauce nasty. I think it would have been great without the blue cheese. Again, either my taste buds are weird, or I just got some gross blue cheese. Either way, lunch was gross and I didn't eat much. By 5:00 I was absolutely starving and remembered my 4 cookies. I ate them and they tasted fantastic -- the first thing of the day that was palatable! I don't even remember if or what I ate for dinner. I think I ended up making Kraft Macaroni & Cheese for the kids. Nice. I usually refuse to buy it.
So that's my general pattern -- I'm not in much of a mood to cook real dinners, the food I eat tastes weird, and then I get so famished that I'll eat something really unhealthy/sugary. At least my form of the Divorce Diet involves losing weight instead of blimping up -- I am grateful for that :-)
Showing posts with label weight. Show all posts
Showing posts with label weight. Show all posts
Sunday, September 13, 2009
Thursday, July 16, 2009
Before Pictures (Kind of)
I took some true 'Before' pictures back in June, but I am too scared to post them. I wore a sports bra and bike shorts, and I NEVER exit my house wearing that little. Even when swimming, I wear a swimming suit with board shorts over it. So I'm not brave enough to post those yet. Since I couldn't post them, I took fully-clothed pictures on July 1, 2009. This is about 10 days after I started exercising.
(Side note: I am guessing that a lot of my body image issues could be solved by not wearing Mom Jeans. I thought the only way you could avoid Mom Jeans was by wearing low rise jeans. There is no way those would work with my body, and I would be very uncomfortable in them. So I figured it was a lost cause. But I stumbled across this fantastic post about wearing flattering non-Mom Jeans and my life has been changed! I actually know what to look for now! I keep waiting to be able to afford some awesome jeans, but I think I'll give up on that for now and go to the thrift store and see what I can find.)
Don't mock my awesome smile:
As I hope you agree, I don't have a weight problem. However, I would like to stop looking pregnant from the side and I would like to reduce some flab around my high hip area. All my excess weight goes straight to this area, and if it gets worse, it will look really bad.
Regardless of the above, I have decided that my primary goals with this exercise program are to be strong, feel full of energy, and feel healthy and joyful. I need to refine those a bit, but that's my main focus, rather than getting to be a certain size or losing a certain number of inches.
(Side note: I am guessing that a lot of my body image issues could be solved by not wearing Mom Jeans. I thought the only way you could avoid Mom Jeans was by wearing low rise jeans. There is no way those would work with my body, and I would be very uncomfortable in them. So I figured it was a lost cause. But I stumbled across this fantastic post about wearing flattering non-Mom Jeans and my life has been changed! I actually know what to look for now! I keep waiting to be able to afford some awesome jeans, but I think I'll give up on that for now and go to the thrift store and see what I can find.)
Don't mock my awesome smile:
As I hope you agree, I don't have a weight problem. However, I would like to stop looking pregnant from the side and I would like to reduce some flab around my high hip area. All my excess weight goes straight to this area, and if it gets worse, it will look really bad.
Regardless of the above, I have decided that my primary goals with this exercise program are to be strong, feel full of energy, and feel healthy and joyful. I need to refine those a bit, but that's my main focus, rather than getting to be a certain size or losing a certain number of inches.
Saturday, June 20, 2009
Jillian Michaels' 30-Day Shred: Baseline
For a while now, I've been reading accounts of bloggers doing Jillian Michaels' 30-Day Shred and having great success with it. Motherhood Uncensored has a whole site dedicated to the Shred. Back in April, I ordered the 30-Day Shred DVD from Netflix, bought myself a yoga mat and hand weights, and then made a bunch of excuses about why I had to wait to start doing it! Then two of the bloggers I read became Shredheads. Lindsay at Suburban Turmoil began Shredding recently, as did Frema at What Are You Looking At?. Inspired by these two ladies beating me, I finally got around to doing the Level 1 workout today. I took 'before' pictures, and those will NOT be shared here! I'm not that brave yet. I might share them with the 'after' pictures later. If you think there's a compelling reason you need to see them, email me.
I plan to gauge my progress by waist/hip measurements, the way my clothes fit, and improvements in strength and endurance. I guess I will measure the last two by whether I can do pushups or play with kids without feeling like dying. I carry most extra weight between my waist and knees, so I think that measurements other than waist and hip won't show much change, unless I gain a lot of muscle. I took all the measurements anyway, just to see what happens. I don't plan to weigh myself very often, since I am hoping to gain muscle. Also, I don't have access to a scale. I wrote out my weight history in my last post.
My starting measurements are:
Neck: 12.5"
Bicep: 11"
Upper Arm: 11"
Ribcage: 28.5" (bust measurements are useless, since it changes hourly because of breastfeeding)
Waist: 28"
Hips: 37.75"
Upper Thigh: 21.75"
Calf: 12.75"
Weight: 123# (I am 5'3", FYI)
Clothes: Size 8 is not comfortable. Size 6? ha ha ha
Strength: Not much (yeah, I know that's not much of a quantitative measurement, sorry)
Endurance: OK (again with the not-so-quantitative). I 'ran' a few weeks ago, and made it 13 minutes. When I calculated my pace later, I was doing a 17-minute mile. I could probably crawl faster than that, so this is not much endurance.
I plan to gauge my progress by waist/hip measurements, the way my clothes fit, and improvements in strength and endurance. I guess I will measure the last two by whether I can do pushups or play with kids without feeling like dying. I carry most extra weight between my waist and knees, so I think that measurements other than waist and hip won't show much change, unless I gain a lot of muscle. I took all the measurements anyway, just to see what happens. I don't plan to weigh myself very often, since I am hoping to gain muscle. Also, I don't have access to a scale. I wrote out my weight history in my last post.
My starting measurements are:
Neck: 12.5"
Bicep: 11"
Upper Arm: 11"
Ribcage: 28.5" (bust measurements are useless, since it changes hourly because of breastfeeding)
Waist: 28"
Hips: 37.75"
Upper Thigh: 21.75"
Calf: 12.75"
Weight: 123# (I am 5'3", FYI)
Clothes: Size 8 is not comfortable. Size 6? ha ha ha
Strength: Not much (yeah, I know that's not much of a quantitative measurement, sorry)
Endurance: OK (again with the not-so-quantitative). I 'ran' a few weeks ago, and made it 13 minutes. When I calculated my pace later, I was doing a 17-minute mile. I could probably crawl faster than that, so this is not much endurance.
Gaining Weight?
I've always wanted to get more toned, fit, and trim. I want to gain strength and endurance. But I'm the type that will exercise for a day and then forget about it again. Inspired by my friend Megan who writes Run! Fat Mom, Run! (and Backyard Farming), I decided to run a 5K. I started this blog to document my progress from Couch to running a 5K, using the Couch-to-5K Running Plan. I started in June or July 2008 and kept running (shuffling, actually) through October. I made it from being able to run 1 minute at a time to being able to run for 30 minutes! By "running", I mean that I could walk faster. I was doing 15 minute miles when I slacked off. But I was moving in a jogging sort of motion! It was getting my heart rate up in a way that speed walking has never done for me. I felt so powerful and awesome. My whole life I have been convinced that I am just the type of person who cannot run. But I can! I still intend to write a few posts about that experience, but since it's been a whole year since I did it, the details will be sparse.
From October 2008 through February 2009, exercise remained on my "to do" list, but I never actually did anything. Then, in February or March, my pants suddenly got tight. I had been thinking I needed to get some new jeans in a smaller size soon, and then suddenly my regular size was tight. It seemed to come on suddenly, with no obvious explanation. I thought that people usually gained weight over the holidays and winter, not just as winter was ending! The difference was so surprising that I even wondered if I could be pregnant, even though I was 99% sure I wasn't. A negative pregnancy test confirmed that. I had been attempting to night wean my nearly-two year old and thought maybe he was foregoing a lot of milk (milk production could burn up 500+ calories per day). Or maybe my metabolism just changed. I am nearing 30, so that could be possible. I tracked my eating on FitDay.com for a few days. I thought I was eating somewhat healthfully, but found out I was eating 800 extra calories per day in sugary treats some days! I'd have a good breakfast and then see that someone had brought doughnuts in (300 calories). I'd get hungry for sugar after lunch and have a candy bar (250 calories). I always have homemade treats on hand at home for after dinner. A piece (or two) of cake adds on another 300 calories. But this is how I always eat (I have written frequently about my sugar addiction at my regular blog). As far as I know, nothing about my diet had changed recently. I tend to be extremely unobservant about things like diet and my body, so I could be wrong, but I think I was eating normally. Unfortunately the pants tightening continued, and soon I was back in my post-baby one-size-larger pants. Now even those are a little tight.
At a doctor's appointment on February 5th, 2009, I was 116 pounds, which is pretty typical for me. I don't have a scale and usually only know my weight when I go to a doctor's appointment. I took a health-related class at BYU the week before my Freshman year started, Fall 1999. We were weighed, and I remember weighing 125 pounds at that time. I lost 10 pounds my first semester due to all the walking and cooking on a tight budget. So I have been about 115 pounds since early 2000. After my first baby, I got down to around 105 pounds, due to busyness/stress, a lot of walking, and extreme breastfeeding. My baby didn't eat many solids until he was over a year old. Babies that age need 1000 calories per day, so apparently I was using up 1000 calories per day nursing.
I started using FitDay.com (it is a free service where you can track food, weight, activities, moods, and body measurements, and it is very awesome) back in 2003 when I got pregnant with my 2nd baby, and since then I've recorded the following weights:
August 2003 - 106 pounds
December 2005 - 118 pounds
January 2008 - 124 pounds (5 months postpartum, Baby #3)
September 2008 - 120 pounds
February 2009 - 116 pounds
When I went back to the doctor a week ago (June 2009), I was faced with the evidence that I really had been gaining weight; my pants had not been shrunk in the wash. I weighed 123 pounds. Now, the weight itself is not really a big deal. I have some fat, but I am not fat. I was very concerned by the 7 pound gain in 4 months. If this continues, that's 20 pounds per year. . . not a path I want to head down.
Faced with the reality of the weight gain, I have decided to start exercising for real. I've been wanting to do the 30-Day Shred I've been hearing so many bloggers talk about. I decided I have two options. I can do the 30-Day Shred and keep my diet the same -- try to eat fewer treats, but not really worry about it. Or I can do the 30-Day Shred in the mornings, get serious about cutting out sugar and getting back to the diet I want (all whole foods, a lot of raw veggies, including green smoothies), and 'run' in the evenings. I'd like to do the 30-Day Shred alone to see how much effect it has by itself, regardless of diet. But if I decide I want to get fit fast, I might throw in the running and the improved diet. For now I'll commit to the 30-Day Shred.
From October 2008 through February 2009, exercise remained on my "to do" list, but I never actually did anything. Then, in February or March, my pants suddenly got tight. I had been thinking I needed to get some new jeans in a smaller size soon, and then suddenly my regular size was tight. It seemed to come on suddenly, with no obvious explanation. I thought that people usually gained weight over the holidays and winter, not just as winter was ending! The difference was so surprising that I even wondered if I could be pregnant, even though I was 99% sure I wasn't. A negative pregnancy test confirmed that. I had been attempting to night wean my nearly-two year old and thought maybe he was foregoing a lot of milk (milk production could burn up 500+ calories per day). Or maybe my metabolism just changed. I am nearing 30, so that could be possible. I tracked my eating on FitDay.com for a few days. I thought I was eating somewhat healthfully, but found out I was eating 800 extra calories per day in sugary treats some days! I'd have a good breakfast and then see that someone had brought doughnuts in (300 calories). I'd get hungry for sugar after lunch and have a candy bar (250 calories). I always have homemade treats on hand at home for after dinner. A piece (or two) of cake adds on another 300 calories. But this is how I always eat (I have written frequently about my sugar addiction at my regular blog). As far as I know, nothing about my diet had changed recently. I tend to be extremely unobservant about things like diet and my body, so I could be wrong, but I think I was eating normally. Unfortunately the pants tightening continued, and soon I was back in my post-baby one-size-larger pants. Now even those are a little tight.
At a doctor's appointment on February 5th, 2009, I was 116 pounds, which is pretty typical for me. I don't have a scale and usually only know my weight when I go to a doctor's appointment. I took a health-related class at BYU the week before my Freshman year started, Fall 1999. We were weighed, and I remember weighing 125 pounds at that time. I lost 10 pounds my first semester due to all the walking and cooking on a tight budget. So I have been about 115 pounds since early 2000. After my first baby, I got down to around 105 pounds, due to busyness/stress, a lot of walking, and extreme breastfeeding. My baby didn't eat many solids until he was over a year old. Babies that age need 1000 calories per day, so apparently I was using up 1000 calories per day nursing.
I started using FitDay.com (it is a free service where you can track food, weight, activities, moods, and body measurements, and it is very awesome) back in 2003 when I got pregnant with my 2nd baby, and since then I've recorded the following weights:
August 2003 - 106 pounds
December 2005 - 118 pounds
January 2008 - 124 pounds (5 months postpartum, Baby #3)
September 2008 - 120 pounds
February 2009 - 116 pounds
When I went back to the doctor a week ago (June 2009), I was faced with the evidence that I really had been gaining weight; my pants had not been shrunk in the wash. I weighed 123 pounds. Now, the weight itself is not really a big deal. I have some fat, but I am not fat. I was very concerned by the 7 pound gain in 4 months. If this continues, that's 20 pounds per year. . . not a path I want to head down.
Faced with the reality of the weight gain, I have decided to start exercising for real. I've been wanting to do the 30-Day Shred I've been hearing so many bloggers talk about. I decided I have two options. I can do the 30-Day Shred and keep my diet the same -- try to eat fewer treats, but not really worry about it. Or I can do the 30-Day Shred in the mornings, get serious about cutting out sugar and getting back to the diet I want (all whole foods, a lot of raw veggies, including green smoothies), and 'run' in the evenings. I'd like to do the 30-Day Shred alone to see how much effect it has by itself, regardless of diet. But if I decide I want to get fit fast, I might throw in the running and the improved diet. For now I'll commit to the 30-Day Shred.
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